Senate Sergeant at Arms To Issue New Guidelines

Fearing a Democrat wave sweeping the nation's political landscape in November, the Senate Sergeant at Arms, who supervises the Senate page program will be instituting House Rule No 69:

All Senators will refrain from lifting pages off the ground turning them upside down and inserting their ... well, you get the drift.

Also, a certain fruit associated with Brazil will no longer be served in the Senate cafeteria. However, another fruit associated with Brazil may occasionally have his blog read into the record, as appropriate.

Comments

[jaime]

http://www.ipt-forensics.com/journal/volume3/j3_4_4.htm

"Child rearing practices in the the Telugu-speaking people of India include behaviors of touching and kissing the penis. The meaning of these customs is not erotic or sexual, but if engaged in in America would most likely be misconstrued and the parents suspected of child sexual abuse. This example illustrates the importance of transcultural issues in assessing the meaning of genital gestures and practices."

[qwfwq]

They're thirsty, right?

[jaime]

It ain't my culture but it exists and it has nothing to do with Pedophelia.

"The parents and their close kin rock, hug, fondle, cuddle, and kiss a baby, boy or girl, unstintingly. Lip-press kisses are bestowed all over the baby's body, except for the orifices of the mouth and anogenital region. In boys, the penis is excluded only until the baby is a year old. Thereafter, his father, as well as other adult male kin, but not his mother or female kin, will bounce a kiss of approval off his penis by first lifting him up to mouth level.

From infancy until age six, children of both sexes continue to be affectionately held, rubbed, smoothed, and patted by parents and kinsfolk. Inclusion of the genitals continues to be the prerogative of boys and their male relatives. The gesture changes, however, from direct lip-penis contact, to a two-stage gesture. First the man flicks or pulls the foreskin of the boy's uncircumcised penis with his thumb and the first three fingers of his right hand. Then he lifts his bunched finger tips to his lips, makes a kissing sound, and throws the kiss back to the penis. This gesture may be repeated two or three times. If the man is a visitor, say an uncle, it serves as an act of greeting. The visitor approaches the boy, puts his left hand around the boy's right upper arm and with his own right hand carries out the penis gesture. Such a greeting is an act of homage that honors the superiority of the son over the daughter. As a male in a line of patrilineal descent, a son is destined to ensure his father's spiritual welfare after death.

At a corresponding age, a girl's genitals receive no corresponding act of homage from her female kinsfolk. It will come, if at all, only from a woman of a lower social rank. As a visitor, such a woman may touch the young girl's pudenda with bunched fingers, raise them to her own lips, and throw back a kiss of homage not to the girl's femininity, but to her superior social status.

These genital customs tangentially overlap with eating customs. The fingers are bunched in the same way as they are for kneading cooked rice with condiments and eating it without utensils as finger food. Only the right hand is used for eating, as it is also for genital homage. The left hand is reserved for washing the anus after defecation."

[qwfwq]

'Genital homage', huh? That's pretty deep, man.

[jaime]

I didn't write that you dumb fuck. It's from the link you didn't read.

Why didn't you read it? Because you wouldn't be able to say Webb is a pedophile and not know you're lying.

[qwfwq]

Calm down, calm down. Let's be friends. Look, I know Webb is straight. Only a heterosexual would write that badly. I mean, look at Danielle Steele. She's straight, too, and her writing is almost as bad:

"Christianna stood at her bedroom window, looking down at the hillside in the pouring rain. She was watching a large white dog, soaking wet with matted hair, digging excitedly in the mud. Every now and then he would look up at her and wag his tail, and then return to digging again. He was the Great Pyrenees her father had given her eight years before. His name was Charles, and in many ways he was her best friend. She laughed as she watched him chase a rabbit that eluded him and promptly disappeared. Charles barked frantically and then splashed happily through the mud again, looking for something else to pursue."

Personally, I can't read that without getting a little nauseared. I mean, where's she heading with the dog? I have strong misgivings, but I'm afraid to read the rest.

Anyway, we're not all conservatives here. Just so you know.

[jaime]

You're right. Bush followers are not conservatives in the least.

[Phoenix]

"Bush followers are not conservatives in the least."

What's up with this kind of statement other than it makes no sense, that it is a generalization? (I grok the sarcasm.) I am in the neo-con camp, I am behind Bush, and I am conservative on a lot of issues. Despite that, I have not abrogated my right to think. I have a lot of liberal beliefs. But I don't define myself by any of those beliefs. I define myself by my character. Call it what you want: free will, pragmatism, reason, choice, individualism.... it's mine. I am a realist above all, and if there is one thing I despise, it's others who would label me with some cheapened political party affiliation that has fallen into desuetude because of the very thing that is bringing us all to our knees: Political correctness. It's metastisized into both political parties, and that's why the little solid steel pedestal of 'independent' is where I stand. So give the generalizations a rest. We're not all stupid here.

[jaime]

"What's up with this kind of statement other than it makes no sense"

Deficits soaring.

Porous borders.

Incompetent and interventionist foreign policy.

Big spending.

Anti-Science.

Nanny Statists.

Should I go on. The only way you can call George Bush is a conservative is to change the meaning of conservative. If you believe you are conservative and have given this president carte blanche to run the country as he pleases (with a Republican house, senate and majorities in the state houses) and 6 years of this shit is the best he can come up with, continuing to support him means you aren't all that interested in conservatism either. A vote for a Republican right now means you neither care for or want accountability. Unfortunately we have 2 political parties and the only practical, rational way to hold them accountable is to split the division of power in Washington.

Phoenix, I didn't especially direct my dig at you. YOu may have been a Bush voter, but you don't seem like a Bush follower.

[SinCerely]

Ohhhhhh nice. A fucking liberal with a wild hair up their ass now starts to kiss ass. Tell us jaime, how much bush do you lick?

[jaime]

You're coming off real well there, hoss.

[rhodeymark]

Jaime - don't you sleep? Left a burning bag of dog poop on your doorstep at the "Webb Is Toast" thread, but after seeing your post times (EST) I decided not to ring the bell. I will give you props here though, you are correct in pointing out several of the reasons paleo-cons (as well as some of us neo-cons) are dismayed with Bush. Compassionate conservatism should have been a more pragmatic approach then what we have witnessed during his tenure. But "Anti-science" and "Nanny statists"? Get a cool washcloth on your forehead and then by all means explain those selections to us.

[Rick]

Actually, the deficit has been PAID down a half as irrelavent as that is. Many African cultures say it's plenty ok to hold down your pre-teen daughter and cut off her clitoris. But it's "their" culture so I guess it's ok too. So then of course is beating a child.

[jaime]

And mohles put babies penises in their mouth to suck blood from the wound and spit it in a bowl. But it's the Jews culture so I guess it's ok too. So then of course is beating a child.

You are inserting the perversion where you know where there is none. It's fake outrage and you know that.

-Yes. This administration hires PR people to head scientific posts at NASA. That's anti-science. This administration purposefullly withholds scientific findings about the environment and changes the language to blunt any damage to them. This administration ignores FDA scientific panels conclusions. If that ain't anti-science, I don't know what is.

And cutting the deficit from the worst in history ever in half to the third worst deficit in history ever is nothing you should ever brag about or note in any way.

[Otis Cribblecoblis]

Jaime: Just FOAD.

[jaime]

Teriffic comeback, Otis.

Like school in summertime...