Discussion Thread

This thread is for open, unmoderated discussion for anyone, including those following the Taylor Behl case.

Comments

[Peace]

Richmonds/Teresa! Hi - I never realized that was you! No wonder I liked you! ;-)

My biggest fear for Janet, as I've been sharing with Abby recently and have shared with Janet in the past, is that the completion of this trial will only allow this particular chapter to be closed so that some sort of healing can begin. However, I always feel like so much focus is put on the trials of the people who have taken loved ones from us and then, afterwards, it hurts even more because there is nothing that will ever bring these precious people back to us. Perhaps it's just me, but I feel like I focus on trials to "fix it" - but it will never be fixed. I have always worried that the hardest time will come after the trial.

[teresa]

peace- I agree, kinda like a wedding. You have all this time planning for the big day and then it is over. I hope she has plenty to keep her busy. It sounds like she has really close friends that help her.

[Peace]

Yes, Teresa - I think you're right about her having some very close friends and I'm sure they will continue doing everything they can to help her through the darkest days and beyond. I just worry that the impact will feel like a punch in the stomach and will not bring the peace every mother - and father and all family and friends - deserves after dealing with a tragedy such as this.

[justathought]

I agree and I am worried that when the trial is over there will be less for her to focus on than the loss.

[Peace]

Exactly, justathought! In a strange way, I think this is keeping her going because she can focus on the justice rather than the loss.

[teresa]

When does BF go to court for the child porn charges?

[Peace]

I think it's not until Sept, Teresa. I've sort of lost track of that one since it's not the main one. I'll probably get blasted for this, but I still don't believe it was his. Now - I'm not saying he didn't know about it because it was in the article (I know, Vedder, I heard you!) that his roommate wrote - but I just don't see how he could have kept something so hidden in such close living quarters as they were with 4 roommates. However, if he knew about it on KJ's computers, he should have destroyed it or turned it over to the police or whatever.

[Vedder]

Hey Peace, good to see you

I don't believe it was "his" either, BUT he did know it was there, and for him to know it was there, he had to have viewed it.

As far as the roommates go, he had many old computers lying around the house.(If you recall, the cops removed SEVERAL computers from his Apt.)

Why would his roomates know or even care what kind of hidden files ben had on one of his many old, half- dismantled, "acquired" pc's?(he was always after "parts", remember?)The KP was NOT on his main PC...

Scumbag didn't seem to have a problem telling the roommate about it though, now did he?

Bottom line Peace, It does not matter if it was "his" or not, it was in his possession and he viewed it. Period.

I don't think you have to worry about getting "blasted" on this one kiddo..

[abigail]

Well, it seems that we all agree that bf is a scumbag, but what will become of Taylors family and friends? Gosh, I wish the dead could rise again with proof of wrong doing against them. What a great "system" that would be. That would be real justice! Uhhhgggg.
He's a real jackass and I'm just so sorry that he existed in a college community setting and took advantage of young girls, especially Taylor.
This may have not helped Taylor of any other victims of BF, but I saw a blurb about colleges turning over applicants papers for a backround check. I think that's a great idea. Employers do it, why not university's and colleges?

[Peace]

Ha, Vedder! I figured I could draw you out! LOL - no, I understand about his "having" it. I guess where I wonder is that I don't think he was really "into" children as I somehow believe that would have been apparent. Does that make sense?

[Peace]

And yes, Abby - it would be great if the victims were able to speak. In a perfect world. Of course, in a perfect world there would be no victims.

[abigail]

I know, and it's sad and that's why so many of us "question". You know what I mean.
Anyway, off to sleep so I can get up and work and ponder about life!
I know I'm a grumpy girl, but I also know I am so blessed!
Take care my blog family!

[Rick]

vedder is right. The KP may not have belonged to bf, in that it MAY not be his own collection. However, in the eyes of the law he possessed the stuff....and knowingly, without an attempt to get rid of it.

[Diane]

Peace,I have to disagree with you on the KP!! LOL...but you know I still like ya!! I keep remembering him saying on one of his blogs about all the codes he had and anyone would have a hard time trying to figure them all out. You can live with someone but you may never really know them.I just think his lawyer at the time is a pretty smart guy one of the best from what everybody has said. If it was just the "possession charge" they were going on I think they would have been dropped by now as from all accounts it belonged to the guy upstairs.IMO there is more to the story. Maybe he tried to sell it and if that is the case then you bet he's in big trouble. I think the KP is more than just the "possession charge"

[vedder]

When it comes to "KP", a "posession charge", is more than enough to get your ass thrown in jail for several years. It does not matter if you have one single picture on your harddrive, or a thousand videos you are trying to sell. Either way, you are in possession of child porn, and you are screwed...

Umm Diane,when you write "from all accounts", you really mean scumbag and his lawyer, right? Because as of right now, they are the only ones who have said anyhing about it NOT being ben's...

Possession of child porn is a very serious crime and it would not have been dropped before it goes to trial. They are going to nail him for that, as well, as the murder of a beautiful 17 yr child...

Benny- boy will be found guilty on both charges and will spend the rest of his pathetic life behind bars...

[abigail]

I hope you're right vedder. I will be a happy girl seeing bf going away forever, but will anyone learn from it--other messed up people living the same way bf did? I'm not only interested in seeing Taylor get justice and her family be "content" if that's even possible, but will this help my child be safe? Will it help my Godchildren, my nephew, my dear friends children, anybody's kids? I know I go back and forth, sometimes I feel confident about the case and the prosecuters and other times I don't. I guess I'm scared, but then I get so angry all over again..how can he not get the max?
Read another article about colleges handing over applications to the state, so they would know who could possibly be attenting our schools in VA. To make sure about crime records and such. I'll see if I can locate it.

[abigail]

http://www.richmondtimesdispatch.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=RTD/MGArticle/RTD_BasicArticle&c=MGArticle&cid=1149189068505

[abigail]

I'm not sure why someone would be against it unless they have something to hide. Dunno. Perhaps they can do a habitat for humanity thing and just build a college for sex offenders and/or other criminals and they can all get educated together! What shall we do with them though after that? We all know our phone lines could be tapped, do I care? NOPE! I've got nothing to hide, nothing the government would care about anyway, unless it's a secret food preperation, then they would be in HUGE trouble! :)

[Peace]

Wow, guys! Thank you! It was really nice to be able to say that and have an adult discussion without being attacked! I really, really appreciate it. I was practically holding my breath making that statement because I don't think it's a popular one but on other message boards, you have to state a popular thought or you're attacked. Anyway - I'm straying from the point here. I just really wanted to say thank you for allowing a discussion.

There are so many things that have left me dumbfounded in this whole case and I very well may be wrong about it actually being Ben's or not. I understand that part about his being screwed either way - in the end it really doesn't matter whether or not it was his or it was KJ's. And I guess in the end, I'm not sure we'll know the whole truth about it.

Abby - I believe wholeheartedly that it would be good to know if there were sex offenders attending the same school. I think we have to be careful in who we're labeling as I think that there have been cases where there's been a couple - married or otherwise - who've had concensual sex in the past and then something happens one night and maybe there's a fight and someone (usually the guy) gets slapped with a sex assault charge when I think it's not quite that simple. While I agree that no is no, I think this person may (situation dependent of course) be a different situation and isn't really a "sexual offender" if that makes sense. We need to know about the scums who really go out to hurt someone. I think, however, that the ACLU would fight against something like this. It's too much "Big Brother" stuff and there are many people who feel it's an invasion of privacy. Now, for repeat offenders, I believe that they've lost their privacy.

[abigail]

I'm just thinking that if you're a registered sex offender then that's it, you have no business being anywhere around kids--aged 0 to college age--or anyone for that matter. Sorry if you want to take classes at the local Community College or what have you. If you're registered then that's "bad" IMO. If you have charges for assualt (sexual or otherwise)and it's a pending thing then sorry, have to wait until next semester or until the trial gets done with--let the court decide of guilt or otherwise. No records would "count" if the court did not convict, but I could be wrong, but IMO that would be too invasive to pry that deep. Things do go wrong and things happen, but if you have been actually convicted of a crime of that nature I do think Universitys and Colleges have a right to know and refuse you. JMO! :)

[Peace]

I've seen enough, Abby, that I think there are some things that just aren't black and white. So, in theory I'd agree with you, however, I think there are exceptions to every rule.

[abigail]

Peace,
Perhaps there are exceptions to every rule, but how far do we bend them? Who do we bend them for and what was done? Ya know? I mean there is a "no tolerance" rule in middle and high schools. Girls are getting suspended for having Midol for period cramps in their purses. That is minor to me, but the rule is that you cannot have any kind of pills--period! That's the rule and everyone knows it, no exceptions. So, if counties have that policy then colleges should have theirs--no convicted sex offenders. I don't know. Rules are everywhere and broken and we still worry about our kids. Dunno!
I'm just a mom with a young girl and I worry about her and her future and pray that I've done enough to teach her how do be safe and smart--and continue to do so, but I also teach her to be kind and to help others. I can't keep her locked up and tell her constantly that some people are mean and might harm her, so where is the "line"?

[abigail]

A post I read just went away prior to my last--maybe I'm exhausted and replied to "nothing"..Weird! I swear there where 2 posts inbetween mine! I'm losing it!

[Peace]

No, Abby - I was wondering the same thing. I did make a post and it's gone. How strange. Dan?

I don't have the answers for you, Abby. Somehow we have to use our common sense - something that doesn't seem to be used much anymore because then sometimes the answers are subjective and people complain that we're "picking" on their children. I think that kids are now allowed to carry a cough drop with them in their pocket. We are permitted to bring in a bottle of over-the-counter meds (tylenol, advil, etc) and fill out a form detailing specifically what they are permitted to take the medication for and when. I remember the Kindergartener who got suspended for kissing the little girl on the cheek. It was considered sexual assault. Give me a break! What are we doing to our children. I told you about my friend - that was considered assault with the way our laws read. It's ridiculous and it's gone too far.

[abigail]

I agree that it has gone too far, Isabel kissed Mack the neighbor on the shoulder, on his shirt and of course being a five year old boy he said, "ewww, don't do that". I explained to Isabel that she should not do that again because he does not like it. She said, "but I was not being mean". I told her that I knew that but if people ask you not to do something because they don't like it then just don't do it. 5 and 6 year olds are another story, but "no" means "no". Isabel's teacher took every kid from I could tell on the last day and told them she loved them and told them how special they were and hugged them. Maybe these rules and laws is why the world seems to have gone to crap (not enough free affection--of the good kind is allowed), but I guess we still need to abide by them.
Thank goodness I'm not nuts--I knew there were posts there! :) Well I'm probably nuts, but I'm glad not about "ghost" posts!

[Diane]

Vedder,Yes I was talking about Ben's lawyer(scumbag) and what has been said.I am just guessing that they had to have solid proof that it did belong to him,or he tried to sell it etc.. I would think that Ben's lawyer would have done eveything possible by now to have the charges dropped if he had the evidence that it did not belong to Ben.I may be way off but that is my opinion.

[Peace]

Hi, Diane - having had this conversation MANY times with Vedder (don't yel at me, buddy!) I can tell you what he's going to say. Of course, hehe, if I don't get it right he'll yell anyway. It would not matter if the child porn was his or not because he had possession of it. Now, I would argue that what if he didn't know it was on those computers? I would argue that that's part of why the defense argued for computer experts. Vedder would respond that - in the article written by roommate, Cesca Waterfield that he told her he knew about it.

Now, at the risk, once again of inducing more anger, I've reread that article by Cesca and what it says is: "The previous tenant had died over the summer, leaving hundreds of adult DVDs, and Ben said he wanted to sell them on eBay. I shared his opposition to waste, and I supported any kind of recycling, whether it was of cans, plastic and paper, or of adult films inherited from a former tenant. A co-worker of mine took issue with me for finding nothing alarming about the pornography Ben actively sold while I lived there. But Ben was an adult and any material that I saw lying around was legal. He alluded to “illegal” porn left behind by the deceased man and said he’d destroyed it all."

http://www.styleweekly.com/article.asp?idarticle=11722

So I guess I have to wonder again - if the computer experts can prove that he did, indeed, try to destroy it (or at least to the point that you need a computer expert to dig it up from the hard drive) and that it was on KJ's computer, might those charges be dismissed? I certainly believe that the defense would try - they'd have to try.

Oh man - I can almost feel the deafening roar from you, Vedder! Be nice.

[nova]

Why should anyone believe anything BF told Cesca? Or anybody else for that matter?

[Vedder]

Umm Peace, "destroy" it how??. I told you before,you CAN'T destroy it, you can't delete it and you can't hide it. If at one time, it was on your harddrive, the Feds CAN and WILL find it.

Even if you use one of those "evidence eliminators",which claim to remove everything on your harddrive, the Feds has special tools to recover EVERYTHING that was once there.And I mean EVERYTHING...

It does not matter if you tried to "destroy" it(because you CAN'T)it was on your harddrive at SOME POINT, and you will be charged with possession of child porn...

Now, replace the KP, with something else that is illegal like a big bag of cocaine, in this same scenario. Would that have been dropped before it went to trial? The answer is of course, NO...

Why anyone would think that a charge as SERIOUS as possession of child porn is going to be dropped before it goes to trial is beyond me

To be honest Peace, I could really care less about the porn anymore. We have much more important things to worry about now..

Like making sure that justice is served for the murder of our girl Taylor..

We are only a few weeks away from the trial, and I, for one, am ready..

[Peace]

Hi, Vedder - I'm not disagreeing with you. I'm not saying it will be dismissed - I'm not even saying it should be. Just wondering out loud how it will all go. In my mind, if they can prove that he tried to destroy the child porn, would they try to get the charges dismissed? I think it's a fair question. As far as replacing it with cocaine, would it still be dismissed? Well, I suppose that if it was there and he had no knowledge of it or if he found it and flushed it down the toilet, then we've got a different scenario. I know that nothing is ever permanently destroyed - I got that. Now, that's like saying that someone could come into my house and plant cocaine in my house and I had no knowledge of it, that I would go to jail for that. I don't think that's right. So, to me, it does matter if he knew about it and if he tried to destroy it and what he did with it in the mean time before it was destroyed. Having said all that, my focus isn't on the child porn, it's on the trial - five weeks from today. I'm not voicing any opinions on his guilt or innocense, I'm just voicing thoughts for discussion is all. I have no real knowledge of the law and am just wondering about some of it.

nova - you have a good point as to why anyone should believe anything he says. I was sort of refering to a conversation on the last thread with Vedder about whether he knew it was there or not. What I have noticed is that various posters have chosen to believe some of what Ben said and discredit others. I don't believe that anyone knows the real truth - possibly not even Ben. I am most worried that we will never know what really happened to that beautiful girl.

My daughter was sharing a story yesterday - one I hadn't realized - is that she remembered Taylor being here. She said how nice Taylor was to her and about the mutual attraction between Taylor and my daughter's cat. I knew Taylor had been at our house a few times, but was unaware that my daughter had met her. She thought it was cute how easily her cat took to Taylor. I suppose it's not a surprise as Taylor and this case has captivated so many of us.

[Vedder]

I hear ya Peace..

My point is, weither it was his or not, it will have to be proven at the trial. It will not be dropped before that...

How many times do you think people who get busted with drugs or Kiddie Porn say, "No, No, the shits not mine, I don't know how it got there"

How many times do you think that works LOL...

Thats really all I'm sayin'

[Rick]

Vedder said: "To be honest Peace, I could really care less about the porn anymore. We have much more important things to worry about now.."

ben will likely get time for the porn..he knew it was there and in HIS case especially having TRIED to delete it is no excuse. SO,the thing to focus on is the murder trial.

[Peace]

Thanks, Vedder - you had me quaking in my boots again! I wouldn't want to meet you in a dark alley unless you were on my side!

You're right, Rick - we'll be focusing on the murder trial soon enough.
Don't you guys go ganging up on me now! Abby - help!

Question - When they say the trial starts August 17th, that means actually in the court room and the jury selection is completed by then, right? I know there was a news article - one of the latest ones about the jury selection in Mathews - that said something about there being one more date at the end of this month set aside for more motions. Nothing on the table at this point - but the potential is there.

[Diane]

Hi Peace:) You know what I think and I will leave it at that!! Maybe I have been watching too many Law&Order episodes ha,ha.....

[Peace]

Law & Order's a great show! I've got Cops on right now.

[abigail]

Don't you guys go ganging up on me now! Abby - help!
Posted by: Peace | Thursday, July 13, 2006 at 04:31 PM

Don't pick on my girlfriend kids! :)
I think bf is going to hell in a handbasket for everything. The porn, the murder--everything. He's a no good crazy man. Hopefully people won't feel sorry for him, but how could they? He screwed up, he put all this on himself. That's what I tell child all of the time when she sneaks and claims "I don't know how that got into my bookbag", or sos and so "asked me to bring this tub of gum to school." We now have to check her bags and ask, "did anyone put anything in your bag without your knowlege?" Hehehehe--that confuses her. I tell her that she's the one who got herself in trouble, nobody else. Maybe bf was never held responsible for his actions. Where his parents the type that thought, 'our son can do not wrong'. Was he mentally ill as a child but was never treated because his parents thought the world was against him? I'm in NO way making excuses for him, but just wonder "why" like the rest of us and wonder where things went haywire in his mind.

[Peace]

Ben was raised by foster parents/adoptive parents (I'm not sure which) who, from what I understand, did everything they could for him and are devastated by what has happened. A family member or friend had posted on one of the boards - I think Websleuths - way back. I believe they must have taken a "tough love" approach when Ben got in constant trouble as a youth. I believe they did what they could.

[abigail]

Pea--I read that he was adopted, do you know at what age or do you know anything about his "biological" folks? Any history of mental illness? Not "blaming" the parents, just trying to understand. There are books now, but every child and/or parent is diffent, so no parent really knows what they are doing! I'm afraid we have spoiled ours rotten, but she really started with the attitude when she started k. Maybe from the older kids she learned how to act like a "pre-teen". Who knows, but things have gotten worse since she started school. Oh well, we just have to deal with it!

[abigail]

A hard drive can be destroyed, gasoline and a match, but gasoline is so expensive these days..and all those inpurities going in the air...however, if bf actually used the old computer on the net then I suppose all that is out on the net "outerspace" and can be tracked. Dunno.

[Rick]

Nobody's ganging up on peace........

[vedder]

Abby, you are right, A HARD DRIVE can be destroyed,....I was talking about "files"...

Ben said he destroyed the KP, not the hard drive, if he had destroyed the hard drive, it would never have been an issue...

And Rick is right, no one is picking on Peace

[Peace]

I know you're not picking on me, guys - just giving you a hard time! ;-) I appreciate your friendship. As you especially know, Vedder, from being on CTV from my beginnings there - I was not, shall we say, always well-received. So I especially appreciate the kindness of strangers now.

Abby - I believe Ben's biological mother is also bipolar. I know it's a genetic disorder and I really don't know anything about her other than that. I visited shortly before his 36th birthday and took all the roommates out for lunch. Ben said that he'd gotten a card from his biological mother with a check in it for his birthday and that he hadn't heard from her in years. He said he heard from her sporadically. He said that he didn't have communication with his "foster" parents at all. Although I've read elsewhere that he was adopted, so I don't know if they were adoptive or foster parents. I just know he said foster. He said they'd disowned them. No - I agree with you. I don't hold any of his parents responsible. No matter what the beginnings, at some point we have to take hold of our own lives and know the difference of right from wrong. I grew up next door to a family that had three children and adopted a fourth. They loved this little guy with all their hearts. He grew up and started getting into a lot of trouble - I believe he was also bipolar but I know there was some sort of mental disorder. Eventually they had to get a restraining order because he would show up at their home and threaten them. Just another lost soul.

[Janet]

Hello all posters!

Haven't been here in awhile and thought I would check in. I am hanging in there as they say.

Cats were mentioned, I was outside with Taylor's cat yesterday and I think she misses her because she wanted me to pet her and she never wants me to pet her!

Porn charges will start after the sentencing for killing Taylor. He have to serve state time before going to the federal prison - if he makes it that long.

I agree as do many others that after the trial is when the hardest times will be for me. I have been focused and had a purpose but after the trial - that's it. Even after the trial, I don't expect to feel any better and some have said there will never be any real closure. Seeing Benny-Boy thrown in jail isn't going to bring Taylor back.

As I had confidence in the Investigation Task Force, once handed over by the VCU campus cops, I have every confidence in the Prosecutors.

Thanks for hanging in there with me and for me!

Janet

[Peace]

Hi, Janet - You know you have a lot of support and prayers. I always have coffee and the hazelnut creamer if you want to talk. You've got a large number of friends with big shoulders and an ear to listen. You will get through this and learn to live with it. It won't be easy, but you'll succeed.

[k]

I've been out of commission for about 10 days, kept my eye on the boards but I'm back...here's to showing support.

[abigail]

Hey guys, it's sort of the "last stretch" until court. Let's keep the blog going--I know it's been slow with not much info to go on. I think bf has another hearing or something towards the end of the month. It's written down at work so I'm not sure of the exact date. Hope he's thrilled with the foul decision he made almost a year ago. I could type away nasty language about how I feel about him, but Dan would kick me off--but I'm sure you guys are feeling the same disgust, so I need not type it out! :)

[Peace]

I believe what you're referring to, Abby - if I remember what I read correctly - is that there is another date set up for motions. I guess it's a last chance thing for the defense - or maybe either side - to file further motions. I would guess all of that happens at the same time, but I think only if there are motions to be filed. I'm not familiar enough with the law and trials and whatnot to really understand it all. I just know the trial is August 17th.

[Teresa]

Hi all... Hey Peace, got banned from OPEN COURT on CTV. :) all over a joke I made. I will just use another name. Have a good one.

[Peace]

I don't believe it, Teresa! No way! Although I recall another banning of a senior poster who linked a single photo that was meant from her heart and very, very funny, but it had bare buns in it and she was banned immediately.

On month from today folks. It sure is coming in fast now.

[Teresa]

I hope we get good reports and I am waiting for the Harvey murder case to get started also. I made a joke about not liking the dentist because of xrays. I don't like things in my mouth for periods of time and I said my husband was not a happy man. :) I got a warning and 600+ post taken a way. I went back on the boards and said how I thought it was crazy. Banned!