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Wednesday, April 12, 2006

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Kelsey,

How do you know the letters signed as printed are not true? I don't see "Style" as a local tabloid as Richmond is a "conservative" town, but I could be wrong...anything can happen but we've got enough beef going on why draw negative attention to a city that is striving to bring people in?

Hi, I'd like to respond to someone who used my name and business mission statement to "slander" Style and their reporting: My name is Copeland, and I own Copeland Casati Media. I program a lot of things for Style, as well as a lot of other people. One thing you should know about me is that I have always been a volunteer. I have cleaned kennels in the SPCA, read books to kids in elementary schools, helped others discover history and architecture. I work really hard to help our city. And to do the right thing. So when I hear someone using my mission statement, which really means: HELP OTHERS (hello, did you follow those links to volunteerism?) and to approach life with grace... well, I just don't know what to say.

As this person says:


'Style' (Richmond's alternative for news, arts, culture and opinion). Alternative? Alternative to what? Credible news? From all appearances, 'Style' looks like a glossy, online gossip magazine that is riddled with tongue-in-cheek humour.

With news headlines like 'Happy Birthday,Dork, and articles that fail to reference many of their subjects by name, I'd question the validity of any information I read in it.

...At least for the time being.

Quote:

Developed by Copeland Casati Media

"Web site development. Print advertising. Volunteerism. Multimedia. Corporate identity. Logos. Regional and Internet marketing. Sponsorship. Letterhead. Mental and physical exercise. Community focus. Humor."

end Quote.

Posted by: error404 | Thursday, April 13

Copeland's note, NOT a part of Style's response and no affiliation:
You know what? I would like each of you to ask yourselves: how many hours have YOU given to other people this year? What have YOU done to help other people? Is it really so bad to try to help the community and try to maintain a sense of humor throughout all of this tragedy? I don't know about you, but I am HEARTSICK of going to all of these funerals. I have been to five funerals in four months and none of them are old. I have no apologies to anyone for stating that my mission is to help others and make someone smile. Obviously we need it.

Talk to me, accuse me, when YOU are working 60 hour weeks while being a stay-at-home mom WHILE donating time and money to many, many good causes. Call me when YOU have a record of trying to make this city better and *doing* something- THEN you can call me names all you like.

In regards to Taylor, which this all should be about anyway:
I am so sorry.
She was a beautiful girl, and I am so, so sorry.
As a troubled teen, who survived; and now, as a mom: There is nothing to say, I am a stranger.
But I am so sorry.


Copeland Casati,

are you having a bad day?

If you read my post carefully you'll see that I wasn't criticsising Style magazine, I was simply stating that articles in it shouldn't be taken at face value as being factual, that's not to say that Style magazine doesn't publish quality pieces of work pertaining to its genre, just that it's NOT a newspaper. It's a magazine right? So what's your argument?

Copeland says: "I have cleaned kennels in the SPCA, read books to kids in elementary schools, helped others discover history and architecture. I work really hard to help our city. And to do the right thing. So when I hear someone using my mission statement, which really means: HELP OTHERS (hello, did you follow those links to volunteerism?) and to approach life with grace... well, I just don't know what to say".

Seems to me you had plenty to say.

typo fix up: *criticise - Be afraid, be VERY afraid! I spend ten hours a day teaching your kids. ;)

Copeland - I don't think anyone was attacking you. Take a deep breath. The fact is: Ben DID NOT sign his name "killerly yours". I think that's all that was really being said.

I also work full time, volunteer many countless hours to the community, have been recognized by the community as a volunteer, and donate many dollars. I don't think we're a minority in that, Copeland. I was touched by the un-ending list of what people in my community do on a regular basis. But I do commend you for giving back to your community.

This isn't about Taylor. And ultimately it should be about her.

But I ask: Whomever error404 is,what is it exactly that you are trying to convey with your statement:
Quote:

Developed by Copeland Casati Media

"Web site development. Print advertising. Volunteerism. Multimedia. Corporate identity. Logos. Regional and Internet marketing. Sponsorship. Letterhead. Mental and physical exercise. Community focus. Humor."

end Quote.

It really does amaze me that seemingly, someone is trying to imply that... I'm not serious? About business, about volunteering, about the community? Or what are you implying? Because YOU quoted ME directly. I don't buy your excuse.

Brand me as "having a bad day"-- perhaps it had to do with the fact that I had attended a friend's daughter's wake that evening, have had a Creative Change Center try to overrun my logo and C3 identity for the past year after being in business 7 years, run my own business while trying to maintain my family, support other people's salaries, yet... spend all my time volunteering, because I love it.

So to see a comment that is seemingly making fun of or being snide towards my identity and volunteering and what is important to me... I don't find that amusing. At all. I don't find volunteerism or succeeding in business trivial.

I guess I must be missing out on a much bigger and more fantastic life than this error404 person has. Oh well. Like today, I'll just pack up my children, dogs and handsome husband and head out for our land which people like error404 would certainly find boring. Maybe I'll be asked to help another organization with their programming or helping them with a web site or helping them in some other way- but obviously error404 certainly does *so* much more for the community than I, as they think it is trivial. Yo error: how many hours HAVE you put in for free this year? Actually- my gut is that you're not a volunteer which is why you find it unimportant enough that you would sneer.

Web site development. Print advertising. Volunteerism. Multimedia. Corporate identity. Logos. Regional and Internet marketing. Sponsorship. Letterhead. Mental and physical exercise. Community focus. Humor.

That is *still* how I describe myself, despite people like error.

Tomorrow I will regain my humor. For the moment it is missing.


Copeland,

firstly, I am sorry for the tragic circumstances that you are having to cope with lately.

Secondly, I apologise if my quoting your Mission Statement offended you, this most definitely was NOT my intention.

I quoted the mission statement mainly because it contained the word 'Humour', and thought that in doing so that it might assist people to understand that the Fawley snippet was merely a satirical spin on current events that should not be taken seriously. I did not intend my post to reflect poorly on the magazine, and certainly didn't intend it to be any type of personal attack on yourself. If this is how I came across to you, then I apologise for the misunderstanding.

I hope this clarifies things a little for you, at least from my perspective.

Take care.

error404

Error404-- Apology totally, completely accepted.

I don't know if you're from Richmond, but this city has just been so full of death recently-- horribly so-- Taylor, the Harvey's... good people full of potential ripped suddenly from the world. We are all in mourning whether we knew these people personally or not. There will never be "getting past it."

I was thinking of Taylor's mother this morning, and how the grief and anger will always be with her...

The only thing I can think of to combat this, even though it doesn't help the victims, is to reach out even more to neighbors and involve ourselves more in the community, helping it grow.

Hi, Copeland,

I just wanted to tell you that I did not get the impression that Error was in any way poking fun at you or Style magazine - at least I didn't take it that way. I will hope it was just a bad day full of too much sadness.

I am glad you're here posting and I will pray that this sadness and these senseless deaths end.

Hi, Copeland,

I just wanted to tell you that I did not get the impression that Error was in any way poking fun at you or Style magazine - at least I didn't take it that way. I will hope it was just a bad day full of too much sadness.

I am glad you're here posting and I will pray that this sadness and these senseless deaths end.

Sorry for the double post. I'm not sure what happened there.

Peace, I forgive you for your double, but don't do it again! :) It happens all of the time here! Hope all is well!

Copeland--please email me. Thanks!

Peace, I forgive you for your double, but don't do it again! :) It happens all of the time here! Hope all is well!

Copeland--please email me. Thanks!

It's quiet again so, just checking in...four months to go...no doubt someone will come up with more info as the months go on...it seems that's been the pattern...until then we'll post just to keep the blog rolling for Taylor

'Behl's Mother Attends Va. Crime Victims' Event'

'The tragedy of Behl’s death has brought Pelasara and Crabill together and created an unusual bond.

Tuesday, Pelasara thanked the victim's assistance staffers who've helped her over the past seven months. She also thanked Crabill'.

more here:

http://www.nbc4.com/news/8994078/detail.html?rss=dc&psp=news

It seems Janet Pelesara doesn't hold the same view of Erin Crabbill that many of the e-mob have openly demonstrated.


I like Erin - from what I saw of the video, she comes across with quiet self-confidence and poise. I hope she does well in the trial. I'm glad she attended the event with her parents. I'm sure they realize that what happened to Taylor could have very easily happened to her. Hang in there Erin!

Thanks Error for the article--you're across the ocean and found it--I'm a slacker! Thanks Erin and everyone else who cares. People have been hard on others here just because they have had their name linked to bf. It's been like the freaking Kevin Bacon game. I've never had a problem with Erin, Cino or anyone else as I have no proof they were involved in the demise of Taylor. There is only one "person" on my shit list (sorry Dan--I cussed :)) for this.

This is a great story. Helping to spread the word of the new information on sex offender registration will help her to stay busy while awaiting the trial.
Too bad there isn't a spouse/partner abuse registry. Maybe that can be the new law inspired by Taylor's loss. If people had known that the BF had a history/pattern of abuse toward females than just maybe that would have helped Taylor to make a different choice as in whether or not to associate with him.

error404 thanks for the link to the video. I live in the DC area and somehow I had missed that on TV on Tuesday. It is a very touching video. Pictures can say so much more than words. But the two words that come to mind about Erin and Janet are bravery and courage.

Having known Erin for a couple of years now, I can say that she has always been a very graceful, quiet spoken young lady. And I DO mean lady. It hurt to see all that was being said about her in the beginning. Even people commenting on a blog about her looking anorexic (but not saying it as constructive criticism). All the nasty speculation of why she shouldn't receive reward money. She lost quite a bit - a whole semester (and I don't think she's back yet) of school, modeling income (whether people approve of her modeling jobs - she was not breaking any laws and she was putting herself through school and paying her expenses), etc. I've never met her father, but I have met her sister and mother and they're all very sweet. This has been very hard on her. I'm happy to see her in a more positive light. I hope she's very comfortable in all of her choices and in who she is.

Peace, I don't know Erin, but I have to say that she should be commended for her role in locating Taylor. It is my understanding that she voluntarily assisted the police in tracking down the location where Ben Fawley dumped Taylor's body and even drove out to Mathews County to walk the area with the police. I can also imagine that she lives with the horror of thinking what Ben Fawley might have done to her.

Considering some of what others said once about Erin it is nice to see something positive said about her. I agree with Peace as I have all along, she is very sweet, sensitive and charming. I will say though Peace, unless that's just sorry video Ewon looks "aged". This BF-BS has taken quite a toll on so many who did not deserve it.

Considering some of what others said once about Erin it is nice to see something positive said about her. I agree with Peace as I have all along, she is very sweet, sensitive and charming. I will say though Peace, unless that's just sorry video Ewon looks "aged". This BF-BS has taken quite a toll on so many who did not deserve it.

Posted by: Rick | Thursday, April 27, 2006 at 05:08 PM


It has taken more of a toll than anyone can ever imagine on so many. I read on CTV a remark from MATTHEWsevenone (aka - Veracity) saying: "And everyone connected with sadness needs to have the weight of this trial lifted..." Since she was so outspoken about her hatred for Mike and for me, I imagine she was excluding us, but the general public has ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA of the domino effect of sadness and changes beyond the obvious of how Taylor's death has directly affected her family. That, of course, is the most important, but I have been astounded by it all. And it keeps going. There are times I want to sit down and cry (and times that I do) at some of the ugliness behind the scenes, sometimes on the scene. All that's gone on via the internet from those who make judgements without even knowing people. I have always thought of myself as an optimist and a positive thinker. This has disturbed my sense of the goodness in people in general. I remember my meeting with Rosa Parks and the year leading up to bringing her to my campus and there were some moments that disgusted me about human nature. Sorry - guess I'm in "one of those moods" where I'm just saddened by it all.

I remember, too well, people ripping Erin, Mike, and several others apart. It's amazing how things and outlooks can change.

Too bad there isn't a spouse/partner abuse registry. Maybe that can be the new law inspired by Taylor's loss. If people had known that the BF had a history/pattern of abuse toward females than just maybe that would have helped Taylor to make a different choice as in whether or not to associate with him.

Posted by: k | Thursday, April 27, 2006 at 10:26 AM

Good idea, but I believe charges were never actually filed against bf in these cases, but I could be wrong. I guess we would just have to go on the VA court case site (and other states, if they have them) to find out info. Fairly sad that it may come to this and it does not post on juveniles. I don't know what I'll do when our daughter starts dating, but that may be when she's 25--after we unlock the attic door for her to come out! :) That's a joke, don't report me she's only 6! :)

Try not to be sad Peace! You know you have support!

Ahhhh, almost Friday...

Finally was able to get the video to play from the crime victims event (had to change browsers) and I like Erin even more now. She's a good girl and she does care--that was evident to me.
Now I guess we just have to wait the summer through, but let us keep Taylor's memory alive here, at least until she and her family gets justice.

I remember, too well, people ripping Erin, Mike, and several others apart. It's amazing how things and outlooks can change.

Posted by: Peace | Thursday, April 27, 2006 at 05:33 PM

That's true. It can all seem really hypocritical at times. Still, on the 'up-side', any shift for the better in attitude, from those who were previously narrow-minded and ugly, is better than no shift at all.

That's true. It can all seem really hypocritical at times. Still, on the 'up-side', any shift for the better in attitude, from those who were previously narrow-minded and ugly, is better than no shift at all.

Posted by: error404 | Friday, April 28, 2006 at 01:33 AM


Absolutely, Error. I believe for most posters, all it took was for Janet to show her acceptance of Erin and Erin will now be accepted. I'm happy for Erin that people will now stop judging her, because all the condemnation is a heavy burden to bear and Erin did not deserve to be condemned.

Absolutely, Error. I believe for most posters, all it took was for Janet to show her acceptance of Erin and Erin will now be accepted. I'm happy for Erin that people will now stop judging her, because all the condemnation is a heavy burden to bear and Erin did not deserve to be condemned.

Posted by: Peace | Friday, April 28, 2006 at 08:38 AM

There are others, who, through no fault of their own, do not deserve to be condemned.

Hopefully some people will learn something from recent developments, and keep that in mind.

error
that is a wonderful sentiment above but I fear that the kinds of folks who jump to conclusions and condemn others are without help.

'error
that is a wonderful sentiment above but I fear that the kinds of folks who jump to conclusions and condemn others are without help.'

Posted by: Rick | Friday, April 28, 2006 at 04:31 PM

Then we shoot them. ;)

Then we shoot them. ;)

Posted by: error404 | Friday, April 28, 2006 at 07:49 PM

Thank you for making me smile, Error. Rick - I agree with you - I think there are those who will never see beyond the nose on their face. They are in a small world and can't see beyond. Abby - thank you. Amusing to me that I never expected to come on these boards for support - I only sought to defend my son and stand beside him and let everyone know he was not alone - that he had a family behind him. Yet support is what I found. Friends are what I found. Yes, there are those "others" - but they are few and I actually feel sorry for them.

Peace; Abigail (aka Pooh) and error the Kiwi are the best. Warm hearted, sweet spirited ladies both. Me on the other hand. Well, I'm liable to start an argument just to make people think about their expressed opinions. From the beginning though I have held out that bf's friends, and their lifestyles, have nothing to do with what he did. I will continue to do that.

"Me on the other hand. Well, I'm liable to start an argument just to make people think about their expressed opinions".

Posted by: Rick | Friday, April 28, 2006 at 09:56 PM

Me too. :)

I'm just behaving myself, (and sometimes if gets REALLY, bloody hard!);)

"Thank you for making me smile, Error"
Posted by: Peace | Friday, April 28, 2006 at 09:34 PM

Peace - you're welcome, it's my dry sense of humour tainted with a drop of truth. Jeez, that almost sounds like a cocktail doesn't it?

Speaking of which...

Ohh Piglet, you taunt me with your alter ego's sometimes when you want to be negative like rabbit or Eeyore, but I know you're just trying to be sweet Piglet! :)
We all know we are most like Owl and most likely will not sway in our opinions. I just know who "dun" it as the rest of us as he confessed and I don't think it was an accident. A normal person does not keep that to himself that long if he did not mean for it to turn out the way it did. Perhaps if he went to CPR classes while the mother of his children was preggie or shortly after they were born he would have been able to save Taylor if it was not intentional. He could have called 911 or run to someones house for help. He made no effort to help her. He covered her up and the crime to save his own skin and made up some ludicrous story to explain his wounds. He's a sicko and I can't relate him to any character in The Hundred Acre Woods!
Sweet freaking dreams bf....

Peace, no need to thank me, I have not done much of anything in this but be angry :)and you did nothing wrong, nor did Mike or Erin or whoever's name is not Ben Fawley. I'm just sorry that he was on the streets that long for these kids to meet him and be involved with him. He's a sociopath and lured kids in--it's over now, he's over now and it's unfortunate Taylor had to die for bf to "die". It's done, he's done. Death penalty or not, he's done. The only wish I have is that his ex meets someone great to help her raise those girls if she has not already. They need someone who is a DADDY and who they can depend on as a positive, constant influence in their lives.

The only wish I have is that his ex meets someone great to help her raise those girls if she has not already. They need someone who is a DADDY and who they can depend on as a positive, constant influence in their lives.

Posted by: abigail | Saturday, April 29, 2006 at 12:22 AM


Thanks, Abby - I believe she already has met and remarried. The girls are pre-teen (or maybe one's a teen now). My heart aches for the girls, too, as - now matter what - Ben is still their daddy and that's a lifetime of pain.

Peace: From my discussions with Abby I think she uses the term "Daddy" to mean someone much more special than a father. Though most reports say ben was/is a doting dad as questionable as that is.

Rick - I totally agree with daddy vs father. I have seen his eyes light up with love and pride at the mention of his daughters. They spent summers - at least a portion of their summers with Ben. All reports I've ever heard - from many - indicate that they enjoyed it immensely. In my own situation, Mike grew up with my husband (his stepfather) and myself. My husband has been the main financial provider for Mike. He, of course, also spent the bulk of his time being the role model. Mike also had a biological father who died a couple years ago of cancer. I believe they have both been both daddy and father, although I defer to Mike on that. I believe they both love Mike and I assume he also loves both of them - again, I'll defer to Mike as I don't wish to answer for him. Since his biological father was only able to afford to fly him out for a short time in each summer, Mike relied more on phone conversations with his biological father. I guess I'm straying a bit here, but I guess that both Mike's fathers would consider themselves daddy and I believe that both have been. As far as Ben, I wouldn't want to take that away from him as I feel they are two different issues - his taking Taylor's life and being a "daddy". I believe Ben loved his daughters and vice-versa and I'm sure this is very hard on them. What Ben did to Taylor was reprehensible, but I don't feel that it should be confused with his being a daddy to his girls. I have no doubt their mother and stepfather are also wonderful people and I recall their stepfather speaking out vehemently towards people who were threatening the lives of these innocent young ladies. I applaud him for speaking out like that.

I like Style Magazine; it is far from being a "tabloid". As for the Ben Fawley "killerly yours" snippit...well, the reason it was taken seriously is because it sounds exactly like the thing BF WOULD do. He truly is that sick, and I will never be able to understand why nobody realized how potentially dangerous this man was. A man pushing forty who tries to look like he's twenty, a man that age who seduces teen and college-age girls, a man with fixations on death, fire, blood, etc? He may as well have had "bad news" tattooed on his forehead. Yet, he blended right in and I suppose was regarded as just another VCU weirdo. I've read a lot of true crime novels, and many of the terrible stories have this same attribute: people ignore the bizarre, odd behavior of a person or persons until the person or persons are revealed to be a murderer. Then all the people who knew the murderer(s) say the same thing: yeah, he/she/they acted really strange, but nobody really paid much attention. Here's a tip for everybody, not just college students: pay attention. Pay attention to someone who exhibits odd or bizarre behavior; it may save a life or lives. And just what the hell do Jimmy Buffet and "parrotheads" have to do with anything on the subject of Taylor Behl and BF?!

"Pay attention to someone who exhibits odd or bizarre behavior;"

What standard should we use for this?

Thank you, Rick - again. Cynthia - some of the weirdest people I know have been some of the kindest and least likely to kill anyone. And some of the "most normal" people are the most likely from reports I've read. I've been called "weird" many times and I always remember to say "thank you". I give you my guarantee that there is not a murderous bone in my body. And I've been plenty mad.

Eh, I'm sure that she meant questionably dangerous. Knowing that I have been accused of being "strange/wierd" among other things just kind of hits a nerve. I also know a wee bit about human nature and I am certain that we all can be accused of the high crime of being "different". I agree that there were loads of warning signs that in hindsight were over looked or never put in one basket. And have to agree that we should watch over our friends and loved ones with a bit more squint in the eye.

I am certain that we all can be accused of the high crime of being "different".
Posted by: Rick | Saturday, April 29, 2006 at 08:06 PM

Thank the good Lord for that, Rick! I celebrate everyone's differences. Imagine how boring life would be otherwise. Geez - I bore myself sometimes, I can't imagine if everyone were like me! lol

I am certain that we all can be accused of the high crime of being "different".
Posted by: Rick | Saturday, April 29, 2006 at 08:06 PM

Yep.

Guilty as charged.

In an 'ideal' world everyone would be able to spot a 'potential' killer and there'd be no tragedy.
I reckon it's a bit like searching through those 'Where's Wally?' books. Beware the one who wears the red and white striped joursey and the pom-pom hat!

A big, BIG warning signal that something was amiss with Ben Fawley was his propensity for hanging out with persons much, much younger than himself. Any adult man (or woman for that matter) who prefers to hang out with children or teens or kids barely out of their teens is someone to be watched and guarded against. I mean, use your common sense: why would an adult prefer the company of kids unless he or she were interested in them sexually? And then there was his immense collection of pornography featuring children and babies. The reason this guy hung around VCU and took classes there was because that was where all the young bodies were. I can't believe he went there to learn about art and theatre; his attempts to create "art" were a joke. And of course there was his violence against former girlfriends. This guy gave off danger signals like crazy. And yet the people who knew him considered him eccentric, but essentially harmless. Unbelievable.

Couldn't agree more with you Cynthia. Ben Fawley was bad news and it was, or should have been, fairly evident from his conduct toward Erin Crabill and others. There was a Justicemag.com article last fall about BF choking another girlfriend and then breaking into Erin Crabill's house with a hammer and standing over her roommate. The ultimate shame is that Taylor did not pick up on this or that others who knew about BF's behavior didn't warn her.

P.S. I like Jimmy Buffet, but I don't see the relevance to this thread either.

Cynthia and "x" - where do I begin? My answers will be scattered in order so you'll just have to bear with me.

a. The pornography - his "immense" collection. Didn't realize the jury made their verdict. IF he had it all along, he hid it VERY well. If, indeed, it was on the computers "inherited" by the tenant's death, there's a different story here. I personally do not see the collection as his own collection.

b. I wonder if either of you knew Ben Fawley? Now, granted I wouldn't necessarily have seen the same side as his friends, but I also viewed him as harmless. Troubled? Definitely. Not a model citizen? Definitely. But dangerous? I never saw him that way.

c. His attempts at art were a joke? There are a lot of pieces of artwork prominently displayed in major art galleries that I don't see the value of. Obviously others do. I suppose we're all art critics in our own way, but I don't think that justifies that he was there to find girls.

d. His breaking into Erin's apartment with a hammer and no one warning Taylor. You obviously haven't read everything and are assuming that no one told Taylor. I say you're mistaken about that. Taylor made her own decisions and wasn't interested to hear it. I think you're also assuming that she spent a lot of time with him and that everyone was aware of it. We don't know for sure that Taylor didn't pick up on it. We don't know what brought Taylor and Ben together that night. We may never know exactly what happened - I strongly believe we WON'T know exactly what happened.

e. Jimmy Buffet. You're right - it doesn't have any relevance to this thread. Is that a big deal? I think it was explained earlier that there is not much else going on and there was interest in keeping the thread going.

f. Why would Ben hang out with people so much younger unless he was interested in them sexually? How about because mentally, that's where he was? How about because no one his age would have hung out with him because mentally he wasn't his age? I'm just offering other scenarios of explanation. Things are not always what they seem.

Peace,

Where is all of this coming from? I simply commented on the Juticemag.com article on Fawley which demonstrates a fairly violent past toward woman. Do you have any evidence to back your claim that Taylor knew of this past? Who warned her about Fawley?

Peace,

It also seems rather at odds for you to say that you saw him as a non-violent person based on your personal knowledge of him and then in the same breath say that Taylor "made her own decisions and wasn't interested to hear it." What exactly was it that she wasn't interested in hearing? Did someone tell her about Fawley's violent background toward woman and she chose to ignore it? Please explain.

Peace, this is a losing battle. No way to win if asked to back up opinion with facts.Some people are unable to seperate hindsight from foresight. And apparently forgotten what it's like to be 17.

The comments to this entry are closed.

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