Now Wait A Minute

When Ian sent a link to the video to the Jersey gal defending Joran Van der Sloot - I had to go back and look at this more closely.

ABRAMS: He wasn’t one of these people — I mean, there are some people when they drink a lot, they really come to be different people than they were sober.

S. CADMUS: Not at all. Because I know people who do become different people when they’re drunk, and Joran is not one of them.

ABRAMS: Do you know how often he drinks? Sort of drinks to get drunk, et cetera?

S. CADMUS: Parties, clubs. Nothing out of the ordinary. Everybody knows teenagers drink. They’re going to drink. That’s how kids are these days. Nothing out of the ordinary — a normal teenage boy...

S. CADMUS: I wouldn’t be as attracted to him and the more, he lived with me for three weeks, so obviously, you know, you start fighting, and just minor fights, “Oh, you left your cereal bowl on the table, you have to clean up after yourself,” just minor fights. Obviously, we would become frustrated with each other living with each other for three weeks. And no violence, no anger at all, just very calm and subdued.

Okay, sorry - let me get this straight - the daughter is or was 16 - they go from flirting at the pool to somehow living together for three weeks under the same roof - and yeah - they drink, doesn't every kid?

Could someone please arrest this idiot parent/woman, friend of the Van der Sloot's for being criminally stoopid and, while you're at it, please remove the f^(k me sign off the daughter's back ... as if you would ever get to see it.

Geesh! Kids, today ... uh huh .... my oh my, how DO they get like this?

Send in the hate comments I don't care ... that is pathetic.

Comments

[JL]

rofl...classic.

[!]

DAN......I AGREE WITH YOU 100 %...

You are right one...!! No disputing you here!! :O)

[!]

RIGHT ON DAN!!! .....OPPS...SORRY ABOUT THAT.

[Aries]

Yep...that was my thoughts exactly. Of course he wouldnt get "angry and offensive" for being rejected...there was no rejecting going on there.
Most likely why he got bored. Too easy.

[Gale]

RIGHT ON DAN! Her mother IS an idiot!

[k.jeanne]

Dan,
I was astounded...read it a couple of times to be sure I hadn't misunderstood! Hard to believe...both sets of parents would allow this.

[Paulo]

Hiya Dan,

You answered your own question, "Geesh! Kids, today ... uh huh .... my oh my, how DO they get like this?"

What kind of parent is allowing 15 to 16-year old girls to get wasted on booze, dope, or whatever? No very good parents.

So she meets this guy (JVDS) and he's a real charmer. Who did he charm more, the kid or the mom? Oh yeah, not to be reduntant, but all sociopaths (Ted Bundy, BTK, etc.) are charmers.

I think maybe the FBI ought to look at the crime in the New Jersey area for the time JVDS was there.

The oddest thing regarding the interview to me was this whole notion of "...total infatuation, romance, living 3-weeks up in Jersey..." all ends with a ridiculous, "...I didn't feel 'that way' for him anymore..." If anything is for certain, this infatuation was lust, not love, and where there is lust...I betting JVDS had a liaison with the mom.

I think this case is about ready to bust wide open!

[scubajap]

About 2 years there was an incident of a missing 16 year old here with her parents staying at the Costa Linda, who wasn't there when it was time to depart. She showed up about a day later, just as everyone was mobilized to start searching, she had been off with "some guy, having an adventure" Costa Linda is a timeshare resort and it was summer, so I wonder if this is the girl, and if the parents owned about 3 weeks. Maybe she wasn't actually "living with" Joran in the sense that most of us imagine it-but they were together so much during her stay that they were practically living together.
I agree-very stupid parents.
I just had a taste of what Beth must be feeling-I had to run off earlier because my son went out with a friend at about six to swim at the Dutch Village and then go to the friends house- I was just about to go and pick him up when The other boy's father called my ex asking where the boys were, here it is after 10 and they never showed up. I just went driving around looking for them, the Dutch Village has nothing exciting there, no nighttime activity, I couldn't imagine why they were gone so late, and my son didn't take his cell phone. I am driving around looking everywhere and my son calls me from a neighbor's the two boys were at my door, they finally walked home. I can't even be angry at him, I am so relieved he is ok.
I will say this, I didn't imagine anyone took him-he is nearly six feet tall and weighs 270lbs
(yes, he is overweight, but he carries it well)
I feared he drowned in the pool, got hit by a car walking on the road in the dark, etc, things like that. It is hard being a mom sometimes.

[Cindi in PA]

I was astounded...read it a couple of times to be sure I hadn't misunderstood! Hard to believe...both sets of parents would allow this.

Posted by: k.jeanne | August 15, 2005 11:53 PM

Maybe hard to understand is more like it. Step inside a grade school, 5th, 6th graders with parents that allow them boy/girl sleep overs.

These kids did not get this way on their own, that's for sure. These are the same parents who defend their bad habits down the road.

[GrannyToad]

This 3 weeks was 2 years ago, right? When Joran was 16, maybe 15.

Charming.

Not.

[annie]

Dan, I shared the same thoughts when I watched that interview. I felt like the parent was just as permissive as the VS parents and explained a lot as to why they were friends.

The other thought that came to my mind was how many people could not believe Scott Peterson could do any harm to anyone because he was charming and so nice. Same with Ted Bundy. So what if she feels he was nice and a normal teen. That doesn't make him innocent or incapable of rape or murder.

I felt the interview was totally pointless and just made them look foolish.

[chickadee]

OMG! Does anyone else feel like we are now entering "The Twilight Zone?" Or, an episode of Desperate Housewives? LOL..LOL..LOL.. chickadee

[Not a Hand Wringer.]

Are some of you people for real?

Having a teen visit your home, isn't the same as having a teen LIVE with your daughter at 16.

I'll put more stock in the statements of two people who actually know Joran and have spent time living in the same house as him, than the collective musings of the RIEHL world goofballs who can't even watch a video without distorting what the people being interviewed have to say.

When you don't like the statements you hear, you twist them to fit your pre-conceived notions time and time again.

How foolish and self-serving.

AS for the teen drinking. Get over it. Just because America is anal about alcohol in it's attempt to over-protect older teenagers, much of the rest of the world...including Aruba isn't.

Even when I think I've read it all here, in terms of ridiculous speculation and conjecture, the Riehl world view manages to sink even deeper into it's own unique class of obtuse silliness.

[letsbefair]

Well, it's a good thing they weren't married, cuz divorce is a bitch...

[Cindi in PA]

Scuba, glad your son is safe and sound. Tomorrow you can beat the hell out of him for scaring you lol.

[(((AG)))]

Come on, Dan. She and her parents met the VDS family while vacationing in Aruba. They all hit it off really well. The VDS family went to New Jersey to visit (could be where the three weeks come in). Then they visited the VDS family in Aruba.

Stop making it sound so titillating. It wasn't.

The drinking? Teenagers do that -- at least a lot I know.

You are sensationalizing something that shouldn't be. She sounded like a very nice young woman.

[kristin]

If I hear "normal teenage boy" one more time, I'm gonna puke

[(((AG)))]

PS:
You have to wonder if this is the American girlfriend that Anita VDS alluded to in her interview. You know, the one that thought Joren was too soft (or whatever the term was Anita said).

[Kat_Gram]

If that was me and my kid, I'd be using a disguise and a fake name. I sure wouldn't be bragging about it. Why are these people on TV ?

[chickadee]

Not a Hand Wringer: Try living with an alcoholic sometime-it gives you a whole new perspective on alcohol/drinking. I am in the health care profession- I KNOW what I am talking about-come spend a day with someone who is terminal with cirrhosis of the liver-it's an eye opener. OOPS!-I am twisting things-tough sh*t-get over it!!!

[Not a Hand Wringer.]

[[ If that was me and my kid, I'd be using a disguise and a fake name. I sure wouldn't be bragging about it. Why are these people on TV ? ]]

Every once in a while the MSM decides to interview one or two people that actually know Joran to counterpoint the 10,000 talking heads they've featured in the last two months who speculate on Joran, know nothing about the case, the suspects, the facts, the investigation, or Aruba and it's legal system...

You know...

Just to be balanced in their reporting.

[Kat_Gram]

This has nothing to do with Joran, but rather a Mum who thinks this is okee dokee.

[Not a Hand Wringer.]

{{ Not a Hand Wringer: Try living with an alcoholic sometime-it gives you a whole new perspective on alcohol/drinking. I am in the health care profession- I KNOW what I am talking about-come spend a day with someone who is terminal with cirrhosis of the liver-it's an eye opener. OOPS!-I am twisting things-tough sh*t-get over it!!! }}

Why would you assume that I have not?

As long as alcohol is available, you'll have a percentage of drinkers that become addicted and suffer the effects.

I don't see how a higher drinking age prevents that.

[bhm mom too]

AG, I watched the interview. I didn't get the idea that they were living together. I got the impression that he came to visit her. Now, it may be weird that you let your young son go visit some girl that he met. I probably wouldn't do that. And I sure didn't let my kids drink. It still makes me startle when I saw my 22 year old with a bottle of beer on a hot day! But I didn't take away that these two were living together.

[(((AG)))]

Posted by: bhm mom too | August 16, 2005 12:32 AM

THE PARENTS WERE THERE!!!!
I think JVDS and this girl did a soccer camp together while visiting this family.

Oh hell, my son's girlfriend used to come stay at my house or go on a trip with us. So wtf is the fuss about.

[Roy]

If I hear "normal teenage boy" one more time, I'm gonna puke

Posted by: kristin | August 16, 2005 12:10 AM

You know, the one that thought Joren was too soft (or whatever the term was Anita said).

Posted by: (((AG))) | August 16, 2005 12:13 AM

Agree with Kristin.

And one thing is clear, Anita has no idea about her son.
She does not really know him.
Joran manipulates her perception of him.

[frenchymom]

Wow! They are SO close to Joran's family (after all they lived together for 3 whole weeks) I am surprised they have't hopped a plane to Aruba already to be there ans support the VDS's. (sarcasm, ROFLMAO)

Okay...back to seriousness now.... they seemed nice enough on the interview (thanks for the link Dan!) I can't help but wonder why some parents openly allow their kids to drink while underage.

[Not a Hand Wringer.]

(((AG))) what you're reading here is varying community standards.

When I was 16 my girlfriend vacationed frequently with my family.
she often stayed over at our house, and I oftened sleeped over at her parents house. That doesn't mean we were shacked up at the time.

Many years later, she's a happy mom with a great job, nice family and nice husband. I'm not doing to shabby myself.

Despite the fact that other than being a prime suspect in a criminal investigation...there's not much that Joran is doing at his age that I didn't do as well at the same age.

You know this might come as a huge shock to some people, but it's possible to be a somewhat wild and partying teen and still do well in life.

I know, because I've lived the life. I grew up in liberated times when teen culture really exploded and changed things ( the 60's ).

Now how come my friends from that era ( many whom I still see to this day ) are all doing well today with professional careers, families, and all the nicities that go along with such lifestyles?

We grew up, just as Aruban teens will in most cases grow up to live normal lives as well.

Look, I realize that Joran is the prime suspect, and I wouldn't bet the farm that he's innocent in this case.

But, I have not seen a shread a proof that means guilt in Natalee's disappearance beyond a reasonable doubt and to attack his character because it doesn't fit the Riehl world of Mayberry RFD is just a desperate attempt to grasp at straws and further demonize the prime suspect.

[GrannyToad]

It's dawned on me that Paulus seems to be phoning up a lot of old friends of the family.

Desperate measures.

[Isanah]

Well, I don't know about New Jersey, but if you allow underage people to drink on your property here in the panhandle of Florida, you will be arrested! There are strict laws in our community. Back when I was teen it wasn't unusual to get adults to buy you beer. But, in the community I live in now, you would have yo be a fool to do such a thing. Not that there isn't fools around here, but you can bet your life I wouldn't take that chance.

I would have a disguise on too if I was that Mom, because the police could very well show up at my door step the next day. I'm not stupid to think that none of my children haven't drank alcohol, but, they sure didn't get it from me. This is CYA issue for me more than a morality one.

[(((AG)))]

Posted by: Not a Hand Wringer. | August 16, 2005 01:06 AM

We are the same era -- getting old!! LOL

I just don't think it is fair to insinuate anything untoward in the relationship between JVDS and this young woman from NJ. It seemed pretty innocent. Three weeks with both sets of parents? Doesn't sound like "living together" to me. Should she and her mother have done the interview? Probably not.

[Isanah]

Effra,

No, I won't say what I really thought of your comment. Too much of a lady to lower myself to your level. I'm was a 16yr. old Mom, now have two master degress and a lovely college educated daughter...so uncalled for.

[scubajap]

But, I have not seen a shread a proof that means guilt in Natalee's disappearance beyond a reasonable doubt and to attack his character because it doesn't fit the Riehl world of Mayberry RFD is just a desperate attempt to grasp at straws and further demonize the prime suspect.

Posted by: Not a Hand Wringer. | August 16, 2005 01:06 AM
I agree with you there,

[scubajap]

The mother looks as if she is only about 15 years older than the daughter.

In other words, whores beget whores.

Posted by: effra | August 16, 2005 01:43 AM
That is completely persumptous. I was 34 when I had may daughter, and when she was 14, and very tall, taller than me, everyone told me they couldn't believe I was old enough to be her mother. When she was a baby, they thought I was her baby sitter, they thought I was too young to be a mother. I'm lucky, good DNA. She probably is too.

[websleuth2]

Two words: New Jersey.

[mulder]

John. Dan put a link to the interview on the top of the post, why did you paste the entire freakin thing. I hurt my wrist trying to scroll past it.

With regards to the interview. I agree with 'Not a hand wringer'. The entire VDS family was visiting them in NJ, thats what she means by "living with him". Way too much is being made of it.

As for the claims of Joran being smart, polite, charming, etc. Of course he is. This whole case reeks of intelligence, cunning and pretty clever trickery. The more I hear these great things about him, the more I think he could have pulled it off ...

[mulder]

... and on the petty side.

What the hell is up with Red over at Scared Monkeys? EquuSearch this, EquuSearch that. This is what EquuSearch ate for breakfast, this is how many bowel movements Equusearch had (and here are my 26 photos). This is why Equusearch is the best, no one bug Equusearch because they are the best.

Red - get over it. You are not a search and rescue hero. You run a blog site. Figure it out.

[mulder]

Dan, don't agree with you most of the time.

However, I do appreciate you giving me something to disagree with. It's a good site and you do a good job.

[Dan]

Thank you, Mulder - I appreciate that.

[kandeyingeorgia]

Well, I must be a real prude here because I am NOT going to invite a teenage boy with raging hormones to "stay" with me and my teenaged daughter for a month. Talk about inviting trouble. That woman ought to be ashamed of herself. She looks like an idiot. What was she thinking? However, I do believe that it is possible that JVS was a nice guy during his visit. Just because we think he had something to do with NH's disappearance (I do), does not mean that he was a psycho then. I'm more shocked that the mother got on national TV to say he stayed with them for a month. Pffffft!

[BocaGrandeGuy]

Does anyone know of any real physical evidence that can link any of the suspects to a violent crime?

Or are we all just having a blast besmirching people we don't even know?

Would we ourselves like to be treated as guilty before we are even given due process?

Would we protect our own sons if they were accused?

Would we send our own sons and daughters to a Aruba knowing full well that their primary goal on the island is to get loaded and go to the beach?

I remember being a teenager. I drank, smoked, gambled, got into fights and hooked up with girls constantly. Lived in Italy as an exchange student. I got straight A's in school, got academic and a golf scholarship to an Ivy League university. I was just like Joran.

I have been to Aruba. My girlfriend and I went their because she was competing at The Worlds when I was seventeen. She raced Laser Sailboats. Aruba is awesome.

It's funny that people are so adamant about having the FBI being involved in this case. When in another missing persons case that happened on a cruise ship in the Med people are saying what a bunch of screw ups the FBI are.

I am not real thrilled about the lack of transparency in the Aruban/Dutch legal system.

But here's a fact that you cannot dispute or ignore.
If this crime happened in Florida.
Thousands of people would not go out looking for Natalee she would be just one of the tens of thousands young girls that go missing every year in America.
Hotels and restaurants would not comp anything. The federal government would not instruct all of its employees to spend half a day searching through cactus groves.
The Marines would not be called into help search.
The President would not authorize the use of F-16s to help search.
Ponds would not be drained at the expense of the government.
Joran would no longer be interrogated because he would have the right to remain silent.
And most importantly those three boys and the father would all be out on the street free as birds and guilty as sin because of the presumption of innocence and the laws of due process that we as Americans enjoy.

America's favorite past time isn't baseball it's hate. We hate like no other country in the world. No one can even come close.

[Whitney]

The bloggers most referenced for NH have just popped over-the-line of reality; the facts would be a welcome clarifying note; of which this matter has a maximum absence of them.

Tito is the best and I think he should "hook up" with Arlene...they and that guy who is the PR fellow from the Aruba government are classic. I love Tito's rendition of what the prosecutor's position is and how the "police are close to solving this case," and how the investigation is "coming very close to solving it." Then Arlene re-states that the Aruban system of justice is "actually a very good one," and "works very well for us."

Then Trattenberg just rattles off something very offensive to most of the USA about the White House's bull dozers and how the Aruba government has no authority over the elements that leave Aruba a mostly lawless land...and for good measure he cites crime statistics of NY and LA...(and BTW...how about those MS13 gangs that bleed over the Mexican border on a daily basis...the INS have caught over 1 million illegal entries this year-to-date...how about the 10:1 ratio that they DON'T aprehend.

So Trattenberg has a point...he's still a very edgy TV personality, IMO.

Let's bring back that M. Croes spokes-lady that would say the same thing every day: "The Aruban legal system is different from the American one; we don't give information about our investigation....drone..."...I really didn't realize how good she was. No BS...just no information and she kept it succinct.

BRING BACK MARIA CROES, PLEASE!

[Bonita]

Damn Straight Dan. I'll "backstop" your on this front anytime. What ARE the parents thinking? I feel that the parents are "in absentia" when I see teens sporting "hooker chic" frocks.

You rock Dan.

Supportively,
Bonita
Canada

[Bonita]

Damn Straight Dan. I'll "backstop" your on this front anytime. What ARE the parents thinking? I feel that the parents are "in absentia" when I see teens sporting "hooker chic" frocks.

You rock Dan.

Supportively,
Bonita
Canada

[What'sthis]

"Well, it's a good thing they weren't married, cuz divorce is a bitch..."

Posted by: letsbefair | August 16, 2005 12:05 AM

ROFL! Priceless. Best I've read today and just as deep, unfortunately.

[DennisAOK]

BocaGrandeGuy,

In the states the case would have been resolved within the first week, one way or the other.

I see no reason for kids younger than eighteen - or even older - to be regularly consuming alcohol, or having members of the opposite sex "sleep over". I don't care what school they eventually go to, or how successful they later turn out to be.

[writingal]

As the mother of two teenage boys, I'm sick of parents who don't know how to raise their children with age-appropriate limits. I live in a coastal resort community, and it's amazing how many local parents have a vacation mentality. It seems like they think that because millions of visitors are here partying, then it's ok for them and their children to live one big party.

I've heard so much lately from other parents here that their children rule the house, and that the parents "feel like they're prisoners under their own roof." These people need to learn be parents, which means you don't provide the kids with free cars, too much free time and plenty of money to spend on alcohol and drugs. And you know where your kids are and what they're doing.

Case in point: Three days ago here, four girls, ages 15 to 16, were driving at 4 a.m. The driver was drunk and/or high. She lost control of the car - a 1-car accident - and it flipped several times. None were wearing seat belts. The driver survived and is out free on bond. One girl died. Another was seriously injured. The fourth was slightly injured.

What were these girls doing out at 4 a.m.? Where did their parents think they were? Who was in charge of their whereabouts? Where did they get booze?

Parents need to be parents.

[kathy]

No hate comments here! Dan your view is on the money. Abrams gave this mother daughter their 15 minutes of fame... for what? One thing I've learned from the news media, no one can recognize the "danger beside us"... look at Lori Hacking's husband, Scott Peterson, need I say more?

[FloridaPatty]

Can someone confirm if Joran was at her house in Jersey?

It sounds to me like he made a trip up there as an opportunity to see the states by invitation. It makes more sense that the invitation was by parents.

Was she his GIRLFRIEND or was she his friend who happens to be a girl?

[Paulo]

Whitney,

I couldn't agree with you more; I have been screaming (until I lost my voice!) for Mariana Croes! She is articulate, clear, concise, and very easy on the eyes. I am saving myself for her.

What were these girls doing out at 4 a.m.? Where did their parents think they were? Who was in charge of their whereabouts? Where did they get booze?

Parents need to be parents.

Posted by: writingal | August 16, 2005 07:16 AM

_____________________________________________________________________

Writingal,

Spot on! As for your statement "Parents need to be parents" at times I can hear the halleluia chorus singing!

Look at just about every sector of American society and it's easy to see where parents are just plain weak, too permissive, lazy, and if they can't handle it...well lets put em' on drugs.

Most of the parents I meet place the blame on the doctors. "Dr. so-and-so put my child on that drug." Yep, and you can take em' off.

My child does their homework every night before going out. Oh really now...do you even look at it? Better still, did you participate in any way?

Most (no scubajap, mbm, Annie, Cindi in PA) parents are being raised by their kids. Why? Simply fear. What if he/she grows up and doesn't like me? Who cares! The kid does. And believe me, crack the whip a few times, make sure you check your child's apartment (phvck me?!?) once in a while, and remember good old fashioned discipline.

Parents are afraid to punish their "great" kids.

Paulo