The Elements Of Political Discourse

A Treatise On Governance

After hearing this week's malevolent rhetoric from Harry needs a reaming Reid, in which he besmirches both the person and judicial record of one, Judge Priscilla Owen, I'd like to catch the stupid, skinny bastard with his butt hanging out in the wind just one time so I could take at his ass with a debarked sliver of good soft hickory.

I'd have the slithery little worm screaming and begging for cloture at the top of his lungs in an Abu Ghraib minute. Hell, i might even make him watch me flush something by Lenin down the shitter for kicks and giggles, whether I needed to go that far with his torture, or not.

And given the low-minded hyper-intellectualized response of the MSM to the Newsweak debacle, I'd like to grab up a firmly rolled copy of an old Life Magazine - one with lot'sa good wholesome pictures, and start thumping them one by one on their over-coiffed heads until they were all left rubber-necked in front of a CRT screen I'd finish off by jack booting right before their eyes in the glorious name of good old fashion media suppression and everything that's the least bit of Holy.

Then I'd likely toss the lot of them out in the backyard during a rain storm and leave them there until, like any other misbehaved mutt, they were forced to take an uncomfortable, brow-furled squat amid the rain drops - all in the interests of instilling within them the noble condition of humility, you understand. Really, it would be done with compassion and purely for their own good.

And finally, as for our esteemed and all too Washington, DC-entrenched Republican legislators, if they don't, down to every last man and woman, start to grow a set and display at least some tendency toward swinging the meat if ya got it, thereby engendering shock, fear and awe into the whiny hearts of the now disloyal liberal opposition, and, consequently get something done and some judges confirmed in the process, I may just invoke the loftiest principle of all political discourse and not vote for them, ... or give them money.

The chicken hearted, over-compromising bastards can learn to spend their lives sucking at the public teat like some Democrat, or a teacher while working part-time at the DMV for all I care if they don't get this thing done.

Of course, all this is why I'm a blogger and not a politician. But presently I don't much care about that caveat, either.

The House will come to order.  It damn well better.

Comments

[Rhod]

This post is a keeper. Let slips the Dogs of Dan.

[Rhod]

That's "let slip".

[Hector Vex]

'swinging the meat if ya got it...'

Classic man, classic.

[David]

Yeh, but Dan, what do you /really/ think? Come on. Stop holding back so much!

[Nickie Goomba]

I agree with David. Stop riding the fence.