Riehl Men Can't Blog

I've been thinking that Riehl men, of which, obviously, (<-- see name) I am one, don't make very good bloggers. Pardon me if I forego the why, you might ask? BS and simply share my thoughts - see, that's part of the reason - Riehl men simply don't care quite so much whether you pardon them, or not. In fact, they might actually prefer that you don't pardon them, disagreement and acrimony being so much easier than the kumbaya thing. At any rate, here are my thoughts.

Unless you've had too much to drink and walk up to the 9th tee at Peeble Beach on a Pro Am Saturday afternoon and smack Greq Norman in the chops for being 1) such an incredible golfer and 2) such an incredible loser, Riehl men aren't the least bit interested in hearing the phrase jumping the shark.

Riehl men think Star Wars was an excellent movie ... for 1970 and some odd number, anyway, unfortunately nowadays it's pretty much the province of insipid computer geeks who need Yoda or Obi Wan, or some such character to invoke the force and tell them to get a freaking life, already. Star Wars is so 5 minutes and 3 decades ago you can't even smell it as it's rotted well past any organic stage. Sorry, but this renders such things as Alliances and so forth completely incomprehensible to Riehl men.

Riehl men say fuck, albeit, hopefully on the rare occasion. But when they need to say it - they simply can't f*ke !t - no, unfortunately, when they feel someone needs a good fuck, well, then that's precisely what they should be entitled too. And they won't necessarily begrudge you a good fuck you, on occasion, either.

Riehl men can be rude. Hell, they've even been known to fart on occasion. But, not to worry - they're also totally content to allow you the illusion that you, and the rest of the world for that matter, doesn't fart - even if it flies in the face of reality - and oft times all too fragrantly at that. Phewww! Of course, that reference is foreign to you, having never had the misfortune of experiencing one. See, Riehl men are intelligent enough to get the whole perception is reality thing. Though they also enjoying pulling the curtain back more often than some might appreciate.

Undoubtedly there are more reasons why Riehl men make terrible bloggers - perhaps I'll share them at a later time, perhaps not. But for now I must be off to work where I, by and large choose not to blog. Not that it might not be fun; however, work isn't always fun in the Riehl world - unfortunate but nonetheless true. So, see ya later! I'm off to finish my coffee, rip a good fart, jump in the shower and pray for an early Spring while driving to work so I can play some Goddamned golf soon - and should anyone wish to take a light sabre to me while I'm away from the PC - It's only a toy, okay?

(Ed note: This post is explicitly NOT directed at, or written in judgement upon any one blog or person. It's filed in my humor category, that would be Riehl humor, as unfortunate or unfunny as you might find it. Sorry ... but, if you don't like it, Fuck You!)

Comments

[Pile On®]

Indeed.

Heh.

Is this the meme now?

[chrys]

Glad to see someone sees the "Riehl" value of "Star Wars" 1977 - I remember the year since it was the first movie "baby" Donovan had to struggle through. Well F*ck - I scr**ed up again!

[Dan]

Hmmm - so Chrys, that was YOU in the theatre with the noisy little bastard??? ALl these years I've waited for this moment! Heh!

[Rhod]

Some of this is wrong. Blogging is a form of battle; it's a way around being old and nearly unable to prevent having your ass kicked if you shoot your mouth off. Middle age is for the birds, so guys like me blog. If I got my ass kicked at this stage, I might never heal. The ass-kicking doesn't matter, but you don't want it to last forever.

War can be fun. Take my word for it. You never get over the thrill of it. Look at photos of men in war. If they aren't smiling, it's because they're taking a drag on a cigarette or drinking from a beer can. If they had a keypad, they'd be smoking and farting and drinking AND typing.

Blogging lets you kick ass again, and provides a momentary sensation of having offed your prey or enemy. Yes, real (Riehl?) men blog. It takes guts to do it.

[John from WuzzaDem]

Hey, was that post explicitly directed at, or written in judgement upon me?

[Ron]

Apparently riehl men work for a living also.

[Eric]

Riehl men also don't use the faggoty sounding word "wictory."